Sex Trafficking Lite

With an estimated 4.8 million victims of sex trafficking worldwide, the United States surpasses other countries with the number of consumers increasing each year. As an industry which is illegal and immoral, many victims are forced into slave labor for sexual services. For sex traffickers, it generates an easy and profitable income. Although sex trafficking is a very serious concern, using women sexually for gain is part of U.S. society already, even legally. If within U.S. culture sex is seen as an acceptable way to appease any discrepancy, particularly in the business world—then what is in question is, how many of these women willingly agree to provide services in situations where there is a mild degree of force or expectation?

It may seem to be advantageous to give into demanded sexual situations if there is a benefit associated with it. With a tight economy, there may seem to be no other option. At the demand of a 3rd party, a woman might be expected to perform in some sexual way for another person, who is probably known, in exchange for non-monetary payment. As long as all involved get some benefit, it is a win-win, and for the performer, an extra means for perks. In the business world, a threat for employment may be enough for an individual to stretch boundaries to concede to sexual expectations to retain a job or as a double benefit for themselves and another individual. It might be being expected to be sexually available to a manager to protect their reputation, or as a way to be hired. There is a fine line between prostitution for employment and these encounters which mirror the sex trafficking model on a lesser level. How willing an individual is plays a factor into being enlisted for sexual services. What may be initially thought of as a one-time-sexual-incident, might end up being a subscription to the individual with the expectation to repeat sexual acts. Set intervals then become the standard to renew the agreement over and over. While these may be forced by another, each individual has a responsibility to set their own boundaries, and even in the most desperate situations, still has the right to say “no” and find other avenues.

A common complaint among women is there is an expectation to fulfill sexual needs of men within professional and social settings. Minorities, who are not Caucasian, are often expected to be the ones who will be available. The stereotype is not far from being accurate that certain ethnicities of women do not think twice about being expected to fulfill high demands of sexual needs—for them it is seen as innate to their culture. While it may not have been as prevalent of an expectation with Caucasians, it is becoming more incorporated as an expectation as cultures mix socially and within the workplace. For minorities who are in financial situations, using sex even if for a non-monetary benefit can be seen as profitable. If a person is expected to perform anyway, then why not do it for a perk or benefit? While the individual may not be open to full porn services which they market themselves for, they may be open to giving into the requests of a 3rd party to perform services if it is seen as more classy and has benefits as a result. For the philanthropically inclined, being coerced into sex may just need a little rebranding. By shifting their perspective to see a requested sexual favor as for the benefit of another, it is seen as a more worthy approach to what is demanded. Therefore, although reluctancy might exist, the service is considered acceptable. In some cases, individuals can be coerced not by threat, but by concept. Rather than selling sex as a mandatory activity, the non-official sex trafficker paints the sexual request done for another as a volunteer activity and one which would require a generous spirit, of which the person is capable of. This good karma will result in connections with desired sex partners and other non-tangible benefits.

Similar to those who are used in the business world or other settings, are those of wealth. Females of affluent families may be expected to be available for sexual services because of their status or as a social expectation of politeness. This can occur in work or social settings. Although they may not be coerced by a trafficker, it may be strongly indicated by a 3rd party, such as a family member or friend, as necessary. In this case, the required interaction is seen as an allegiance to continue a bond between families socially as a “tipping of a hat” of sorts. Providing sexual acts may be also self-demanded because of their upbringing. These interactions while they may or may not be enjoyed, have a relatively low threat level. It would be inaccurate that this obligation would the considered as sex slavery. Although it may be demanded the expectation is still within the acceptable boundaries these women set for themselves and participate in willingly without saying “no”.

Within the family, children are also subject to sexual demands with older members of the family serving as low-level traffickers. Children from the time they start becoming sexually active, might be expected to perform sexual services for the benefit of another. As minors, some are too young to live outside of the home. As a sex nuance, the child might be enticed with a benefit or gift in exchange for a high expectation to strip, be fondled or have sex at the request of a family member to win them over for specific reasons. Children may not know how to report the situation if they even realize this is wrong. Others might be abused if they do not do what is expected. Minors, even as teenagers may not see any other option, as they are trapped living in the home.

Beyond these work and society expectations, traffickers exist who manage loose business operations offering sexual services on-call as a provider of “a resource-in-place”. These calls are set up through a 3rd party who manages women in different areas to be on-call to show up in case there is a need to offset any perceived inconveniences or flaw of a specific person present there. Services are called upon, to simply show up and be available, whether needed or not. These connoisseur services are managed by a 3rd party who pays the “on-call sex temp” a small amount of cash, to be available in case sex is needed, for the perceived safety or benefit of another. A woman wanting to earn extra money, might be called upon to go to a local establishment to be available to provide for sexual services if needed to offset the inconvenience of another present. In many cases, there may not even be a threat or expectation from anyone there. The “one being saved” may have nothing to do with the connoisseur agreement, and in fact be humiliated as the “sex savior” shows up to advertise the unnecessary need. The 3rd party pays the woman, who has a chance of being needed, and she is expected, if requested, to offer exposure, stripping, or sex, for any offense. In a sense, the coercion is placed on the business owner who is forced to welcome a person offering suggestive services at the expense of his business. Without questioning for more information, some managers may see it as a favor bestowed to them. The 3rd party uses it as an intent to build a relationship with the business and to provide a low-risk, quick cash opportunity for the resource.

The same occurs in the business world to offset any potential error made by an employee. A 3rd party hires a woman who is paid to be the backup refund policy with sexual services she offers. Third parties will advertise such services even prior to employment of a candidate. The 3rd party provides the opportunity for these sexual providers to be available and recruits them to advertise their services as part of the package of what a new-hire brings to a company. Several issues exist with this. The first is that the candidate has no part of the negotiation. Secondly, it is presenting the idea that an offset is needed, and even prior to starting a new job. Thirdly, it is selling the idea that this type of prostitution becomes the expectation for anyone’s employment and works as an advantage to sell the candidate. Sexual services become the expectation for any employer that does not receive 100% accuracy or 100% satisfaction. There is no room for human error, gives no credibility to the hiring team, and encourages a culture of sex in the workplace. It is an unprofessional employment accessory which is being marketed as the new standard.

The highest-level of coercion by traffickers to willful participants, is discrimination. This trafficking is unique in that it spreads discrimination of an individual for employment and within society if not available for sexual services. Instead of the sex trafficker managing the sexual service, they manage the prevention of an individual being hired for employment or shunned within society until the sexual activity they desire occurs. Meanwhile, they revere the sexually available as more worthy of existence in any setting. This oppression, besides shutting doors, can take many forms of verbal disgrace, shun, and public humiliation. Propaganda can be passed to employers to shun a new-hire throughout entire teams and to customers, disregarding all HR policies and ending new jobs within a couple of days or even just a few hours. Traffickers select key individuals who will spread sexual hate comments, within the workplace, to earn a few extra dollars, at the expense of an employee present to be humiliated. Greater propaganda influences the views throughout cities in all places to publicly humiliate and mock. The thought process is by persisting with this, forcing their demands, the person with other standards will eventually concede. It can continue for years, if not decades, as sex trafficking members involved become so determined on forcing a situation with the intent of seeing conformity to their demands.

In the end, boundaries are important to have for any female. Parents need to teach children boundaries at an early age and what is appropriate sexually and what is not. The word “no” is important for all ages. Each female must determine what is acceptable and what isn’t, and to what extent she can sacrifice her life to it. Ultimately, sexual permission is in the hands of the individual, and anything else should be able to be walked away from, or if taken against her will then the individual(s) involved should be incriminated.

Written for Our Bread Foundation, Inc., June 2020


Learn more – See these resources…

Books
Sex Trafficking: Inside the Business of Modern Slavery
by Siddharth Kara

Teaching True Love to a Sex-at-13 Generation
by
Eric Ludy

Consent: The New Rules of Sex Education: Every Teen’s Guide to Healthy Sexual Relationships
by Jennifer Lang MD

Movie
Trafficked 
Starring: Ashley JuddElisabeth RöhmSean Patrick Flanery
R-Rating (parents be advised)

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The U.S. Response to Sex Trafficking

Sex, which should be an act of love between a man and woman, has an entirely different meaning from a business standpoint. For most, the word “prostitution” comes to mind when sex and business are associated together. However, one of the largest issues when it comes to illegal sexual activity is the crime of sex trafficking. Sex trafficking involves using force or coercion to make an adult or minor engage in commercial sex acts in exchange for money, food, shelter, drugs or possessions. Sex traffickers force an individual to provide sexual acts, which can include escort services, sex in illicit massage storefronts, outdoor solicitation, pornography, personal sexual servitude, interactive cybersex acts or as companionship at bars and clubs (Polaris). With an estimated 4.8 million victims of sex trafficking worldwide, the United States surpasses other countries with the number of consumers of sex trafficking averaging 400,000 per year according to the Global Slavery Index (Reuters, 2019). As an industry that is illegal and immoral, the benefits from the business yields a revenue stream of $100 billion per year at the expense of the thousands of victims forced to perform (Time, 2014). As a response to the sex trafficking concerns in the U.S., the government is passing more legislation for the various kinds of trafficking that exist and specific demographics that are affected by it. Several advocacy programs and non-profit organizations also reach out in response, with resources for victims and to drive awareness to the problem.

Who It Affects and How It Works
Preying on the vulnerable and the desperate, sex traffickers often target those who are in seemingly hopeless situations. They often prey on individuals who have suffered from previous kinds of abuse, are impoverished and/or have a low level of education. The majority of victims are female adults, children from foster homes and runaways. Sex traffickers seek out those who they can coerce and force into sex. Different from prostitution, which is at the will of the party involved, these individuals are involuntarily used for sex. Sex traffickers use women, men and children as slaves, forcing them to perform sexual services for clients. Often the victims are solicited from social circles or within the neighborhood and taken to hotels or massage salons where they are used (Reuters, 2019). Trafficking services are less likely to be traced because most transactions are done by cash. Of those who are caught, 90% of victims are arrested for selling sex, while less than 10% of buyers are arrested (USIAHT, 2020). Online advertisements have also played a role in sex trafficking, advertising online sex opportunities to vulnerable people as a way for them to escape from their current situation.

The Response 
As a global issue, countries throughout the world, including the United States, have established laws against trafficking, which is considered a form of slavery. The federal government has increased efforts to prevent sex trafficking by passing legislation that addresses various sectors of sex trafficking. In 2000, the Trafficking Victims Prevention Act (TVPA) was passed to define human trafficking victims as a person induced to perform labor or a commercial sex act through force, fraud, or coercion. It protects undocumented immigrants who are victims of severe trafficking and violence and also provides protection specifically for those under the age of 18. Within the last 10 years, there has been an increase in legislation as the sex trafficking industry has grown. The Preventing Sex Trafficking and Strengthening Families Act of 2014 was passed to decrease trafficking among children in the foster care system and to assist locating runaways. Statistics show that once children are on the street, they are solicited for sex within 72 hours (Human Trafficking Advocacy, 2020). This Act helps locate children and protect them from the dangers of becoming involved in sex trafficking. The following year, in 2015, the Justice for Victims of Trafficking Act (JVTA) of 2015 was introduced to support victim assistance, provide rehabilitation services, serve fines to offenders, other anti-sex trafficking efforts and an increase in liability for buyers of commercial sex. In 2018, in response to online sex trafficking, President Trump signed the Fight Online Sex Trafficking Act (FOSTA) to combat online sex services (NY Post, 2018). Websites such as Craigslist and other webpages facilitating sex trafficking by listing victims to be bought and sold are now subjected to liability with tighter restrictions in effect (The Verge, 2018). This bill helps curtail Internet hubs that allow for posting or advertising illegal sexual services and sharing sexual content. The government has increased measures to lessen trafficking, but catching trafficking can be complicated as it is hard to trace those involved. However, this increase in legislation brings hope to victims who have been trafficked.  

In addition to legislation, several nonprofit organizations are resources for women and children who are survivors of sex trafficking. They help victims recover from the psychological and physical trauma of slavery and abuse. Advocacy groups help victims learn the difference between healthy and unhealthy relationships and bring awareness of the problem to the community. By receiving education as well as counseling, survivors are able to face what they lived through and find healing from what they experienced.

 

 

References

Human Trafficking Awareness and Advocacy Group. (2020). Working To Make a Difference. Retrieved from http://www.humantraffickingadvocacy.org

NY Post. Fonrouge, G. (2018, April 11). Trump signs law against online sex trafficking. Retrieved from https://nypost.com/2018/04/11/trump-signs-law-against-online-sex-trafficking

Polaris. The Typology of Modern Slavery: Defining Sex and Labor Trafficking in the United States. [PDF File]. Retrieved from http://www.heatwatch.org/human_trafficking/sex_trafficking#2

Reuters. (2019, December 9). Top hotels sued for ‘industry-wide failures’ to prevent U.S. sex trafficking. Retrieved from https://www.reuters.com/article/us-trafficking-hotels-usa-idUSKBN1YE074

Time. Luscome, E. (2014, May 20). Inside the Scarily Lucrative Business Model of Human Trafficking. Retrieved from https://time.com/105360/inside-the-scarily-lucrative-business-model-of-human-trafficking

The Verge. Robertson, A. (2018, April 11). Trump signs anti-trafficking law that weakens online free speech protections. Retrieved from https://www.theverge.com/2018/4/11/17223720/trump-signs-fosta-sesta-sex-trafficking-section-230-law

U.S. Institute Against Human Trafficking. (2020). It’s Time to Eliminate Demand. Retrieved from https://usiaht.org

Written for One Bread Foundation, Inc., June 2020


Interested in learning more?…Shop Amazon! Click to view!

Sex Trafficking of Children in the United States:
Overview and Issues for Congress (CRS Reports)

by Congressional Research Service

Confronting Commercial Sexual Exploitation and Sex Trafficking of Minors in the United States: A Guide for the Health Care Sector
by Institute of Medicine (Author), National Research Council (Author)

Child Welfare and Child Support:
The Preventing Sex Trafficking and Strengthenin (CRS Reports)

by Congressional Research Service

Preventing Child Trafficking: A Public Health Approach 1st Edition
by Jonathan Todres and Angela Diaz


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How-To Phrase It: And You Can Quote Me PODCAST

Listen to the Podcast on Podbean
See the Words and Phrases Infographic

PODCAST SCRIPT

Hi, this is Clean Up Dallas with Culture and Kindness and today is June 6, 2020. Today’s podcast is: How-To Phrase It: And You Can Quote Me.

As you all know, it’s good to stay current with the latest news, or the “buzz”. And when it comes to knowing what is going on, you want to be the first to know. The top stories from the top sources—or if it is juicy enough, from any source. That’s right. The latest gossip, the good, the bad, the ugly and everything in between. It’s what keeps many going, even at the expense of another person’s life and reputation.

How do you distinguish what is gossip and what isn’t? The trick is knowing the difference between what is proper to talk about and what isn’t. If it is someone’s personal business or a sensitive matter relating to another person, there really is no excuse or positive reason to share it with another. Still unclear of what is acceptable and what isn’t? Here’s an example. Julie is talking to Mary about Joannie’s wedding coming up. She mentioned she is so happy they are getting married. That statement is not gossip as long as it is not a secret that they are getting married. It is a generic statement stating happiness for the couple. If she starts talking about details of Mary’s life, what she is doing, or scorning about why they shouldn’t get married, then that crosses the lines of gossip. Gossip can be on anything. It usually revolves around taboo topics such as sexual topics with regards to another person, financial matters, relationship issues, or medical information. Don’t assume that it is ok to talk about these things with another. It can be very hurtful, especially if it forms the mind of another person or becomes public knowledge. There are several types of gossip. Here are some definitions.

Gossip is the spreading of a truth or unconfirmed fact about someone

If a story is already circulating then it is a rumor. A rumor is a currently circulating story or report of uncertain or doubtful truth.

Slander is spreading untrue information about someone to damage their reputation.

If is published in print or online and is a false statement about someone then it is called libel.

And Propaganda is information, especially of a biased or misleading nature, used to promote or publicize a particular political cause or point of view.

All of these can cause defamation. Defamation of character is damaging the reputation or name of someone which can happen through any of these civil offenses which could be taken to court in a lawsuit. Talking about someone is not a light matter. Taken to an extreme sharing information about another person can severely damage a person’s life even to the point of suicide or murder. And you can quote me on that.

One way to determine whether what someone is sharing is gossip or not, is to check a few key things. Is the person sharing it with the good-will of the person it is about? Is the information necessary? Is the person you are talking to the source? Are they reliable? Why are they sharing the information? Is it for their popularity at the expense of another? How will you benefit from hearing what they are talking about?

If what they are sharing does not meet these or you feel uncomfortable, cut the conversation off and if it continues walk away. Telling the person that the information would not be appreciated by the person it is about,  is one way to indicate that what they are sharing is inappropriate.

How do you prepare yourself for propaganda? It may not be as frequent as gossip, but it is gossip and defamation at a larger level when it targets a specific person. The person’s name doesn’t even need to be named to do damage. Propaganda is a biased opinion which is spread to promote a point of view. In worse cases it can be taken to every retail store, business, public and private venues, and organizations. Many retail stores are easily swayed to use their businesses as a means to support opinions that have absolutely nothing to do with the business. Yet, although this may seem highly illegal, the only way to find justice is by a civil lawsuit, and in many cases it would prove to be a futile effort. For an average person, this type of “gossip” spreading through propaganda can cause discrimination, shut down opportunities for work, cause homelessness, targeted hate, organized crime, hopelessness and more. One would think in huge cases like this, someone would stand up, but as with any gossip or selling of information, it can snowball like an avalanche and gain steam to become the popular voice regardless of the details or meaning behind it. There is something wrong with society when this goes against one individual without means for defense and such damage is done. Business owners and managers of any business should really take a look at what they allow in their business. Significant fines should be placed on them, besides the fact that customers should refuse to shop at stores that do this. The personal social platform should not be at the retail stores. The stores are there to sell the products they have and maintain their brand image. Several stores claim by promoting propaganda from the community it supports their business as they become a hub for the latest update—at the expense of the life of an innocent party. This is a real issue in the DFW area and probably not just in DFW but throughout our country. It is taking Freedom of Speech the wronggg way, and for all those who have participated either on the business end or as customer eagerly wanting the latest morsel of juicy news as they shop, the quote needs to go elsewhere.

Quote me on it, there’s a lot of clean up to be done with the standard in DFW. Besides the news and who’s talking, phrases need to be set aside and highlighted. What phrases do you use when you communicate? We easily can slip into derogatory remarks, discriminatory name calling, or other phrases which can be said and hurt others. Cleaning up the expressions you use can really make a difference in the people who are around you. Why cut people up? Use words of praise frequently and politically correct ways to speak. Discriminatory name calling can often be thought of as racial, but it can be sexual, belief related, intellectual, about social status, or a number of other things. People love to make fun of people for some reason, mostly for popularity and to build their ego, or as a way to control or empower another person. This verbal injury blow is a form of abuse, especially when it is repeated. It is easy for it to catch on with others and suddenly another person is isolated out as a target to be made fun of. You are in control of what you say and you have the power to make a positive impact with your words or to negatively impact someone.

Soap and scrub the dirty words and phrases which are of bathroom humor, sexual humor, racial in nature or other lower standards. Speaking well increases your social standing with those who want to be around you, as well as professionally.

Not everyone sees the damage they cause as much as they seek being cool and their seek own popularity. Instead of speaking and listening to the latest hearsay, why not get to know the target and find the good qualities to speak about instead. It’s better to win friends who may be different than you by taking time to understand them rather than slamming them down with gossip, insults or name calling. Reach for the higher standard by finding acceptability and compromise rather than mocking others to tear them down.

And if you hear any of this, don’t let the cat get your tongue! Speak up and politely correct when you hear comments such as these. Here are some suggestions of ways to stop gossip:

  • Change the subject
  • Say something positive about someone who is the target of the gossip
  • Confront the gossip by pointing it out
  • Point out missing information
  • …and you can also turn gossip into prayers

Just saying—saying it better by speaking well about people is where winners are at. If you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say anything. But how you phrase it and what you say matters.

And you can quote me.

Interested in improving your relationships in how you speak? You won’t want to miss the podcast Tongue Tied on June 24 which will discuss the importance of speaking well. We also have 2 excellent books selected for our book club this month which give tips on improving your conversations and speaking well. Clean Up Dallas with Culture and Kindness’ book club this month on June 27. The first book discussion will be held at 2pm on Facebook live as we try out the new video Meeting Group for our chat and discuss The Lost Art of Good Conversation A Mindful Way to Connect with Others and Enrich Everyday Life By: Sakyong Mipham. Following this at 3pm, we’ll discuss this month’s second book  30 Days to Taming Your Tongue. What you SAY (and DON’T SAY) Will improve your relationships by Deborah Smith Pegues. Be sure to RSVP to join the discussion!

Follow Clean Up Dallas with Culture and Kindness on Facebook and WordPress and on Twitter @cultureofkind


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Rape Part II: Stealing Someone’s Life

We think of rape as a sexual and physical act of non-consent. Can this word also be used to describe the non-physical violation of stealing someone’s life by spying, eavesdropping, sending dreams to inquire answers to probing questions, learning behaviors to master them, and having the goal of gaining absolute knowledge of every aspect of an individual without their consent? If a person is a criminal, and is under investigation by the FBI, there might be some leeway for this type of intrusive activity—with the goal to stop crime for the safety of others. For the average person however, doing this, is a way to rape a person’s life devaluing their human existence and worth.

Seeing Each Life as a Gift with Consent to Share
Each person is given the gift of life. We all have our individual paths and stories. Not all of this is to be shared as public knowledge. A movie called The Circle, is a very good example of what technology has the ability to do, to access anyone’s life at any time. There are benefits to the convenience and power of being able to know anything about anyone at anytime, but doing this desensitizes the value of human existence stripping us down to objects rather than a person. Some rather know all facts and intricate details about a person and then publicize these, rather than experience the beauty of the human spirit which is to be found in knowing an individual and the gift of revealing ourselves to others and sharing our uniqueness with others personally.

“To be part of someone’s life is a beautiful gift. To take the liberty of overstepping boundaries to partake in someone’s life without permission is another form of rape.”

There is a gift in the joy of sharing our stories and experiences to others ourselves. Part of being human is to also have the right to privacy and discretion in what we share. We allow people to have access to certain areas of our lives and withhold other areas to remain private. Our need for privacy stems from wanting to preserve our dignity. Another reason is that trust must be earned before certain people earn the right to know information. Other areas, which may be guarded the most, may be reserved only for self with our personal thoughts, relationship with God, intentions, and dreams. We set boundaries for our privacy when it comes to those areas which require more confidentiality. These areas are not for public knowledge. They may be with about financial information, information about our relationships, our deepest thoughts, desires, or creative ideas we have. There is an inner area of ourselves that should have the right to be withheld from other people who may want to pry. It is in this area where we develop ourselves. In fact, there probably is an entire psychology around this very topic. When what we value as private information is viewed without our permission, we are violated. When our behaviors and unique qualities are learned and duplicated by others, or our ideas and creativity are accessed before we share them, it no longer is our individually which is enjoyed and we are stripped. Instead of admiring what we contribute, the intent is to clone and cheapen what value we bring to the world. It is devaluing to what we contribute to the world. It can be devastating because it is what we are made of, our personality, our talents, our stories, our mannerisms, or anything else of our existence.

The Human Relationship is What Is Seen
The human relationship must be put first. Individuals who turn to remote devices to access other people’s lives remotely to spy and eavesdrop without permission are building habits of destruction. Using this application, they seek to learn everything about another person by watching them, accessing them without permission. Unconsciously they place themselves as more important than the other person, taking the liberty to view them, meanwhile trampling over dignity and human respect, and accessing what is not their right to access. In all essence, it is the infinite quest for knowledge they seek to acquire, which has been tantalizing to humans since the Garden of Eden. To have god-like access, almost equal to God himself, is magical. It is a way to “enter” into the life of another. Some people even become so addicted to this that it becomes the relationship. Just like a new-found porn, or entertainment TV show, the viewer can see into someone else’s life to be with them, silently viewing, or speaking real-time in a one-way conversation to the victim. To the victim, it is highway robbery of their life, and even their soul. Everything that composites the human life from eating, to dressing, going to the bathroom, what is written, created, experimented, and anything that nourishes individuality, and interactions with other humans is all accessible. All secrets are revealed, even if they aren’t secrets. All methods are learned. Learning and sharing these with others, the victim feels their soul as it is ripped and shredded. Not a second is private. It destroys new creativity to be watched. New creativity, which has always been protected by inventors or artists with trademarks for fear of being stolen, is all void. The rapists see new ideas and creativity the moment it is developed, even before it is close to being publicized and they publish it to others with this knowledge they obtain, even before it is fully-created, as if it is their right. Their right, as they see it, is to be all-knowing and all-deserving to be god-like. They use this information to build their popularity for the destruction of the victim. All experiments, new experiences, or anything which develops the person, are also violated. It stunts these creative moments—and who wants to try things as much when someone else is right overhead to view and steal the moment of inception. Joy and inspiration are severely quelched to a dull moment of pain, and withheld instead. The same happens with human relationships as they are overheard, viewed, and participated in as if it were an interactive sitcom. These relationships, no matter what kind, cannot stand a chance with 3rd parties witnessing them and intruding upon them. The addiction to trespassing on the life of another is one which devalues the human existence and multiplies with a plethora of consequences.

In all essence, being viewed, your life is no longer your own to experience and live. A person has to wonder why these intruders do not value their own life, spending time living it to its potential with all the experiences life has to offer, rather than spending their life viewing the life of another person. Secondly, you have to wonder why these offenders do not value the dignity and respect of human existence, instead overstepping these obvious boundaries, to invade upon another person’s life to destruct it. Stealing someone’s life is a form of rape. While it may not be sexual, the holistic experience is violated and damaged.

“When you touch someone’s life it is a privilege. When you touch someone’s heart it is a blessing. When you touch someone’s mind it is an honor. When you touch someone’s soul it is a triumph. When you touch someone’s spirit it is a miracle.”

—Clean Up Dallas with Culture and Kindness


Information Privacy Law (Aspen Casebook) 6th Edition
by Daniel J. Solove (Author), Paul M. Schwartz (Author)

Protection of Information and the Right to Privacy – A New Equilibrium? (Law, Governance and Technology Series (17)) 2014th Edition
by Luciano Floridi

Movie
The Circle
Starring: Emma Watson, Tom Hanks, John Boyega

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Rape Part I: Physical Sexual Assault

Physical Sexual Assault and Rape
Sexual assault without consent is wrong, no matter what age a person is. It is taking the liberty of sexually violating another person without their permission or consent. Physical rape, rape by objects or using other body parts, sexual abuse, molestation, sex trafficking, indecent exposure, prostitution, and internet sex crimes, all are sexual crimes. Rapists have different ways of attacking their victims. A person can be a victim of a physical rape attack, with or without a weapon being used. It can occur anywhere as a forced situation by one person or a group of people who are known or unknown. Another approach is using drugs, alcohol, or spray to make the victim helpless unable to defend themselves. Sexual activity without consent is a violation and is against the law.

Portrait of the Victim
It would seem that the provocatively dressed women, with luring comments or seductive moves, lingering in questionable areas of town, late at night, would be the most likely to be raped. Surprisingly enough, this is not the case. Research has shown that victims of rape are more likely to be conservatively dressed passive women who are violated by people they know. In addition to the number of women who are raped, approximately 2.5% of the male population is raped per year. Rape does not just happen to women who put themselves in compromising situations. It can happen to anyone. Being aware of situations and practicing preventative measures helps in lowering the chance of being raped, but it is not foolproof.

Rape prevention programs can target the source of the problem by providing education on respect and the importance of observing boundaries. Rape cannot entirely be prevented, however, teaching women (and men) awareness of what to look for in their associations with people and how to be more cautious can help with preventing rape from happening.

Steps to Preventing the Possibility of Rape
Knowing what to look for and having a plan in place helps with being safe. Here are some ways to prevent the possibility of rape:

  • Be aware of your surroundings at all times
  • If you’re in college, know that the majority of rapes happen during the first few weeks of the year
  • Don’t leave your drink unattended
  • Drink responsibly
  • Stick with your friends
  • Stay safe at clubs
  • Be assertive
  • Keep personal information private
  • Always keep your phone charged

What to Do
With each situation being different, there is not one way to handle a rape situation. Here are some suggestions:

  • If able to, cause a distraction
  • Enlist others
  • Get loud, shout, and push back
  • Practice self-defense methods of aiming for areas of the body which can be damaged the easiest: eyes, nose, ears, neck, groin, knee, and legs
  • If unable to defend yourself in a struggle or where a weapon is involved, concede to the path of least resistance or safest possible position

    After a rape situation:
  • Ensure your safety and get medical attention
  • Call to report the situation afterwards to the police or a sexual abuse or rape crisis hotline

What to Look For
How can a person identify who might be a rapist? Here is a list of characteristics which are indicators of dangerous individuals. Avoid situations with someone who exhibits these characteristics or where a person could successfully use violence to attack you.
Source: www.nononsenseselfdefense.com.

Here is a list of danger signs to recognize in people who could be a threat:

1) Insensitivity for others/emphasis on self – Does this person put his wants above the needs, feelings or well being of others? Is getting his way more important to him than other people’s welfare? Often this can go beyond mere selfishness and border nearly on an “assumed divine right.” Often these people will justify a particularly vicious action with a flip comment like, “Hey, that’s how the game is played.” Such a person has no understanding that he must co-exist with others. Because he simply exists he thinks the world “owes” him whatever he wants. A common tactic of such a person it to make you feel bad for not doing what he wants.

2) Belittling behavior or attitudes towards others – Does this person habitually make nasty, belittling or degrading comments about others – especially under the guise of joking? Does this person think he is better than others? Does he look down on others? A nouveau riche aristocrat? Is he a racist? A person who thinks that race or social position makes him superior can also assume gender does too. When you think you are superior, an assumed right to ‘take’ what you want often follows.

3) Negating behavior or comments – Closely related to 1 and 2. Does he try to tell you what you are feeling or thinking? Or worse, tell you what you are not? Comments like “you don’t really mean that” are serious indicators of someone trying to negate you. A person who negates others is trying to take away the other person’s thoughts, feelings and needs and attempting to project his wants onto that person. The most obvious example of this is “Well even though she said ‘no’, she really meant ‘yes’”.

4) Hostile and/or threatening language – What words does a person use? Choice of words convey subconscious assumptions about a particular topic. For example a man who generically refers to women using profane names does not have good assumptions about females (or much respect). It is all too easy to dismiss this behavior as just “blowing off steam.” But if it is a constant behavior, it goes far beyond that. Someone who habitually uses violent or threatening language should be carefully watched for possible escalation. It’s on his mind already. It’s a uncomfortably short step from ‘thinking about’ to ‘doing’.

5) Bullying – This behavior is especially dangerous. Does this person use overt or subtle threats to get his way? A bully uses the threat of violence more than actual violence. Most often bullies are not willing to risk conflict with someone who can hurt them (an alpha male), and will instead chose to intimidate someone he considers weaker and safer. Someone who is bullying over other matters can easily turn to bullying you regarding sex. The close conversation subjects because it angers or upsets them or they will have a long and elaborate story how it really wasn’t their fault.

6) Excessive anger – How easy does this person anger? Is he a “Short Fuse”? Does he boil over at the slightest problem? This is an indication of chronic anger. A person who explodes over a minor issue is like a full pot boiling over on the stove. It’s not that the issue is all that important, but that he has so much anger already, any more causes him to explode. Often people with chronic anger look for targets to vent their anger at. This could manifest as physical fights, abuse, or rape.

7) Brooding/ revenge – Does this person hang onto his anger long after the situation is over? Will he still be stewing over something while everyone else has moved onto other things? Will he become anti-social and glare at the source of his anger from across the room? Will he insist on taking revenge for real or imagined slights? Both indicate a petty and obsessive personality. A brooder fixates on something and then works himself into a frenzy over it. A person who seeks revenge “has to win” and is willing to take it to extremes. Refusing such a person’s sexual advances can turn this tendency towards you.

8) Obsession – This is a close cousin to number seven. It is a major factor with acquaintance rapes. This is the person who won’t leave you alone. He insists on ‘hitting on you’ long after you have told him no. He is always trying establish forced intimacy (see ‘bonding process’ below). Such obsessions easily turn into anger when his advances are rejected. One day he shows up in a fringe area, drunk and attacks.

9) Extreme mood swings – Beware someone who can go from wildly happy to deeply wounded at a moment’s notice. This sort of personality can feel justified to commit an unlimited amount of violence and damage, because you “hurt his feelings.” This is a common pattern among those with chronic anger about life.

10) Physical tantrums – How does this person get angry? Especially when denied “getting his way”. Beware of a person who regularly physically assaults his environment i.e. hitting walls, kicking things etc. It is only a short step from striking a car to attacking you.

11) Jock or gorilla mentality – This mentality promotes both acceptance and encouragement for the use of violence. It is especially common among participants of contact sports. What is most insidious about this mentality is the “jock” receives, not only positive reinforcement, but out-and-out applause for being aggressive and violent. This can easily lead to a failure to differentiate between the playing field and real life. Mike Tyson’s comment is a prime example: “Nobody ever objected before.”

12) A mean drunk – Nearly all rape and abuse cases involve alcohol. Watch what surfaces when someone is intoxicated. It shows what is always lurking underneath. Do not put yourself into a situation where you would deal with such a person while he is intoxicated. Most importantly, don’t allow your facilities to be diminished by alcohol or drugs in this person’s presence.

13) Alcohol or drug abuse – To begin with drug and alcohol addiction can in be traced back to selfishness and a refusal to change one’s world view. Alcohol and drugs are not the cause of bad behavior, rather they are used as an excuse! Often the attacker intentionally became intoxicated to ignore the social restrictions and inhibitions regarding violence.

14) Smooth-talking individuals – These smooth-talkers can easily convince others into believing what they want them to believe. And the more you want to believe the less convincing he will have to do. But without this willingness to ignore common sense on your part, even the smoothest con-artist has no power and no chance to harm you.

While there are others, these behaviors are serious indicators of a potential rapist. This short list should acquaint you with the basics. Not all men are rapists, but a person like this has a higher probability than others. You not only find these traits among rapists and abusers, but also professional criminals. Philosophically there is little difference between such, they are all selfish. Most often it is just a matter of degrees, style and choice of victims.

Some rape situations cannot be prevented. Many times rapists will use sprays or drugs on the victim so they become unconscious before taking advantage of them. Being aware and cautious of where you are and who you are with can help prevent rape. In situations which cannot be prevented, be sure to report what you know and what happened as soon as possible. It may take several days or weeks, but in many cases the victim can recall at least part of what happened and can identify who was there.

Information from www.nononsenseselfdefense.com


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